Last week I had the pleasure of working with the nine executive team members of a fast-growing marketing company.  As the group grappled with the challenge of identifying and naming the principles that drive their business, I made two observations.  First, every single person at the table was actively involved in attempting to solve the problem.  Second, the nine executives were each using different and seperate methods to attempt to get to a solution.  One person was drawing on a flipchart, one was working away in his notebook, a third was attempting to go around the room to ask others’ opinions, yet another was verbalizing a proposed solution.   Each of these behaviors were positive, yet none were particularly helpful because all of these actions were occcuring simultaneously!  These executives were engaged in Parallel Play.

According to the Child Development Reference (Volume 6), Parallel Play is a term that was introduced by Mildred Parten in 1932 to refer to a developmental stage of social activity in which children play beside rather than with one another. Children in this stage may comment on what they are doing or imitate what another child does, but they rarely cooperate in a task.

As I watched the dynamic unfold in this boardroom, it occurred to me that parallel play is taking place millions of times a day in meeting rooms across the country.  In order to function effectively as a decision-making body, I believe that each executive team needs to be able to identify when parallel play is occurring, stop working separately, and start working collaboratively.  Of course, this requires consciously paying attention to the processes that are being used to come to a decision, not just the content of the decision itself.  Doing so can greatly reduce the time wasted in meetings and result in better – and more – outcomes.